Inferiority complex can be described as a general lack of self worth, a doubt and uncertainty. It can also be viewed as a feeling of not measuring up to standards. Inferiority complex can be a damaging feeling. Its that self demeaning feeling which stems from a low self esteem. It makes you have a lack of confidence; seeing challenges as too big for your strengths and success as too far from your reach.
During my early days in the university I battled with inferiority complex. And that continued up until my 3rd year. It wasn't exactly a fun time for me cause I would ''cave'' most of the time. And that was a stark contrast to who I really was as an individual - an extrovert. Coming from secondary school I had a blooming time; I would always finished amongst the top 3 in class. When results were announced I would line up with other scholars and a resounding round of applause followed from other students. It was a huge boost as far as confidence was concerned. It made my cheek pump with pride.
But when I got admitted into the university it was a different league entirely. I faced new challenges which overwhelmed me - clearly I wasn't ready for what faced me. While that already posed a big problem there was an even bigger problem - I couldn't step up to overcome these challenges. Before now I grew a certain dependency on someone to guide me. Someone I trusted would forever lead me on in wisdom. And because she too had attended the same school and I felt really confident I would overcome eventually. But lo and behold she disappeared. She wasn't as involved in my life anymore. She was no longer there for me to draw inspiration from. Subsequently my confidence started to take a downturn and that affected everything.
It got so bad I ''feared'' being around my own friends. At the time, I didn't think I deserved to be in their midst. This feeling of lack of self worth also creeped into my academics. First of, I hated my course of study. So much so I didn't attend classes 60% of the time. My grades? As poor as you'd expect. My relationship with classmates was also very poor. Simply put, I didn't like talking to them. It also affected my relationship with the opposite sex.
All of these are what a low self image can promote. There are other cases of depression, and even death! Luckily it didn't result to that and was able to regain my confidence(more than 100 fold). Before I highlight how I overcame this, let me for the record state that I had friends. Friends who were really good to me. But in my heart I was troubled, weak and my soul lingered, and was in desperate need of identity and belonging. I wasn't communicating with anyone. All I did was just smiled and moved with the crowd.
How I Overcame Low Self esteem/Inferiority Complex
First, I believed in two things - the power of God and the power of my will. I had an encounter in my second year which helped shaped me - I got connected to God. Gradually He taught me how to stand tall and tell myself I wasn't defined by my shortcomings. I would wake up every morning reminding myself of how much strength I had just because He lives. It wasn't easy given God wasn't like a being who could stand next to me and be like ''Hey, Eric, how're you doing?''. I had to trust in an entity I couldn't see or feel. That wasn't how I grew up but still He taught me how to. I also had to believe that I could do and achieve anything. Literally anything. And I started making progress gradually, attaining little achievements as I went on.
Second thing I did was to have a purpose and fueled my passion.
Last thing I did was build healthy relationships with the people around me. That broke my wall and I was able to communicate with people better. I opened up to a few persons in my circle about my struggles and I was able to get support and encouragement. I finally had ''friends'' in my class and the air was more harmonious. Grades went up drastically and my confidence returned; was even better! There have been increased levels of consistency ever since.
Inferiority complex can be a big mess in your life if you allow it to continue. Overcoming it starts first with believing, then effort and finally consistency. It has to be a conscious decision not to be overwhelmed by challenges, regardless of what they are, cause at the end of the day it is your life and you get defined by the amount of battles you fight, learn from and win. Also, don't make the mistake of depending on people for your strength, you have more than enough in you. The sooner you start sapping from it, the sooner you will overcome and the sooner your dream starts becoming a reality
During my early days in the university I battled with inferiority complex. And that continued up until my 3rd year. It wasn't exactly a fun time for me cause I would ''cave'' most of the time. And that was a stark contrast to who I really was as an individual - an extrovert. Coming from secondary school I had a blooming time; I would always finished amongst the top 3 in class. When results were announced I would line up with other scholars and a resounding round of applause followed from other students. It was a huge boost as far as confidence was concerned. It made my cheek pump with pride.
But when I got admitted into the university it was a different league entirely. I faced new challenges which overwhelmed me - clearly I wasn't ready for what faced me. While that already posed a big problem there was an even bigger problem - I couldn't step up to overcome these challenges. Before now I grew a certain dependency on someone to guide me. Someone I trusted would forever lead me on in wisdom. And because she too had attended the same school and I felt really confident I would overcome eventually. But lo and behold she disappeared. She wasn't as involved in my life anymore. She was no longer there for me to draw inspiration from. Subsequently my confidence started to take a downturn and that affected everything.
It got so bad I ''feared'' being around my own friends. At the time, I didn't think I deserved to be in their midst. This feeling of lack of self worth also creeped into my academics. First of, I hated my course of study. So much so I didn't attend classes 60% of the time. My grades? As poor as you'd expect. My relationship with classmates was also very poor. Simply put, I didn't like talking to them. It also affected my relationship with the opposite sex.
All of these are what a low self image can promote. There are other cases of depression, and even death! Luckily it didn't result to that and was able to regain my confidence(more than 100 fold). Before I highlight how I overcame this, let me for the record state that I had friends. Friends who were really good to me. But in my heart I was troubled, weak and my soul lingered, and was in desperate need of identity and belonging. I wasn't communicating with anyone. All I did was just smiled and moved with the crowd.
How I Overcame Low Self esteem/Inferiority Complex
First, I believed in two things - the power of God and the power of my will. I had an encounter in my second year which helped shaped me - I got connected to God. Gradually He taught me how to stand tall and tell myself I wasn't defined by my shortcomings. I would wake up every morning reminding myself of how much strength I had just because He lives. It wasn't easy given God wasn't like a being who could stand next to me and be like ''Hey, Eric, how're you doing?''. I had to trust in an entity I couldn't see or feel. That wasn't how I grew up but still He taught me how to. I also had to believe that I could do and achieve anything. Literally anything. And I started making progress gradually, attaining little achievements as I went on.
Second thing I did was to have a purpose and fueled my passion.
Purpose is the reason you journey. Passion is the fire that lights your way - Unknown.Like I said, I hated my course of study. So I had to start learning new ways to appreciate it. I didn't just want to manage, I wanted to blossom extravagantly. So I started setting goals for myself - short and long term, and putting effort to bring them to fruition. I revisited my other passions(music and writing) and started making strides. Trust me, it wasn't a smooth transition, I still failed at times, but my desire to be better was a strong enough pull to allow me persevere and attain success.
Last thing I did was build healthy relationships with the people around me. That broke my wall and I was able to communicate with people better. I opened up to a few persons in my circle about my struggles and I was able to get support and encouragement. I finally had ''friends'' in my class and the air was more harmonious. Grades went up drastically and my confidence returned; was even better! There have been increased levels of consistency ever since.
Inferiority complex can be a big mess in your life if you allow it to continue. Overcoming it starts first with believing, then effort and finally consistency. It has to be a conscious decision not to be overwhelmed by challenges, regardless of what they are, cause at the end of the day it is your life and you get defined by the amount of battles you fight, learn from and win. Also, don't make the mistake of depending on people for your strength, you have more than enough in you. The sooner you start sapping from it, the sooner you will overcome and the sooner your dream starts becoming a reality
When you develop yourself to the point where the belief in yourself is so strong that you know you can accomplish anything you put your mind to, your future will be unlimited. - Brian Tracy
